You might be a complete and total screw up if…

Clarksville, IN - You might be a complete and total screw up if you stuff your stash in your back pack and then take it to a Presidential Event where you know it will be searched.

According to Ottumwa Police records, a 25-year-old Illinois man was arrested after a Secret Service search of his backpack hours before a visit by President Barack Obama.

Police records indicate Thomas Persino, from Des Plaines, Ill., is charged with prohibited acts and possession of drug paraphernalia. The arrest happened at Indian Hills Community College while Secret Service agents were securing the area.

An ABC News spokesman said Persino was hired as a soundman to cover the presidential visit.
KCCI 8 News: Report: Man Arrested With Pot Before Obama Visit

It never fails to amaze me the lengths some people will go to raise the bar on stupid. Hope his local burger king is hiring.

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But on the other hand, pot is the best recreational substance for teenagers, athletes, people who have naturally high adrenaline. But you can't exercise and be high. It's impossible.
- Tommy Chong

Sure they didn't…

Tampa, FL - Now infamous White House dinner party crashers Tareq and Michaele Salahi appeared on the Today Show Tuesday morning. This was after the couple made it fairly clear they were not going to be giving interviews without substantial paychecks.

The problem with that is legitimate news organizations are not supposed to pay for interviews. Paying for interviews is reserved for the "tabloid press." As a result of the Salahi's stance none of the traditional bastions of journalism took the bait.

At least until yesterday morning when they appeared on the Today Show. Host Matt Lauer specifically asked if the Salahi's had been paid by anyone to make the appearance. The answer was an undeniably firm no.

But let's take a look at this paragraph from a USA today story:

NBC's parent company, NBC Universal, also owns the cable network Bravo. Michaele Salahi has been trying to land a part on an upcoming Bravo reality show, "The Real Housewives of D.C.," and was even filmed by the Bravo show around town as she prepared for the White House dinner.
USA Today: White House crashers went without confirmed invitation

Technically by sticking to a strict lawyer's definition of the question "did anyone pay you to be here," no is probably the correct answer. It would have been interesting to listen in on any calls that may have taken place between the Today Show bookers, NBC Universal Corporate, The Bravo networks executive offices, the production company running the reality show and the Salahis.

If someone from the production company shoved the Salahis arms up behind their backs while dangling a reality show slot in front of them, that is not really being paid either. But it is really freakin' close.

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The TV business is uglier than most things. It is normally perceived as some kind of cruel and shallow money trench through the heart of the journalism industry, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free and good men die like dogs, for no good reason.
- Hunter S. Thompson

"I've got some good news and I've got some bad news..."

Sometime in 1980s a meeting of the entire 60 Minutes staff was held. With corporate and network Gods looking on, 60 minutes executive producer Don Hewitt addressed the gathering. He used words to the effect of, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that for the first time in television history a network television news program made profit. The bad news is that for the first time in television history a network news program made a profit. The show is 60 minutes and from now on television news will never be the same."

Don taught the rest of us how to do it. That is only right because he is the one that figured it all out in the first place.

Thanks for all you did Don. You take my undying respect to the grave with you.

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I plan to die at my desk.
- Don Hewitt